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Office Parties: The Most “Fun” You’ll Be Forced to Have

Writer's picture: DEEPAK RUCHANDANIDEEPAK RUCHANDANI

Updated: Jan 18

Ah, office parties. A quarterly ritual where we all pretend to bond while silently counting down the minutes until we can leave. If you’ve been to one, you’ve been to them all. Let me break it down:


- The Dance Guru: There’s always that one person breaking out dance moves like they’re auditioning for a Bollywood remake. The rest of us? Expertly holding up the walls.


- The Red Carpet Star: Dressed to kill… and making the rest of us question why we even bothered ironing our shirts.


- The Human Waterfall: Drinking like tomorrow’s the start of a global alcohol ban. Pro tip: avoid eye contact after their third round.


- The Blabbermouth: Talking non-stop, powered by who-knows-what. We all nod politely while plotting our escape.


- The Party MVP: Mingling, laughing, acting like they’re hosting the Oscars. Newsflash: nobody’s giving out trophies here.


- The Dance Enforcer: Dragging everyone to the dance floor with the enthusiasm of a PE teacher on Sports Day.


And let’s not forget:


- The Manager Show: The boss sharing “wild” stories that sound suspiciously rehearsed. 


Bonus: if there are multiple managers, they’ll form a bar-side duo, discussing bonuses like they’re the next Jay and Veeru.


- The Rumour Mill: Someone drops a spicy piece of gossip, and before you know it, everyone’s whispering like it’s the stock market.


Superficial? Check. 


Shallow? Double-check.


But hey, these parties are “mandatory for team bonding,” so we all grin and bear it.


Honestly, why not try something better?


Like thoughtful meet-ups or offsite where people actually connect (shocking, I know). 


You know, things that encourage kindness, empathy, and conversations beyond "So, what do you do?"


Until that happens, I’ll be over by the snacks, living my best life.


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